Soulless Fiend!
by Matt Cyr
Summary: On a simple Grimm-clearing mission, Team RWBY makes a discovery that turns their entire worldview on its head, a discovery that could potentially lead to several uncomfortable questions.
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

In a recent study, five hundred people equally spread across the four kingdoms and their outlying territories were polled in a one hundred question survey. The topics of the questions ranged from the quality of life in their home area, the culture in their home area, and other civilian matters. There were also questions about their opinion on Hunters and Huntresses, such as the effectiveness of their work, and whether they were being compensated enough.

However, for the purposes of the particular study discussed in this essay, only one question mattered. The other questions were useful for other studies that came together with this particular one to create a survey for all their purposes, but for this particular study, they were simply smokescreens. This one all-important question was question number ninety-nine out of one hundred. This question was, "What defines a Grimm?"

The actual answers delivered varied, and almost no two answers were alike on the surface. But when considered, and when clarifying questions were asked, the answers boiled down into three distinct categories. The categories, and the percentage of total answers that category contains, are listed below.

The largest category, with seventy-eight percent of the total answers, was "If it looks like a Grimm." Those who gave an answer belonging to this category essentially believe that if something looks like a Grimm looks, if it is black, with red eyes and white bone armor, it is a Grimm. While on the surface, this answer appears harmless enough, it betrays a danger in society. If humanity as a whole knows so little about our mortal enemies, we may not be able to stand against them for long. As a result of this worrying amount of ignorance, the four kingdoms' education systems have begun revising their curriculum, to better teach about the titanic struggle to survive that man is consistently embroiled in.

The second-largest category of answers contained twenty percent of all answers. This category contained answers that, at their core, consisted of "Anything that is driven to destroy humanity." While this type of answer is much better informed than the majority answer, it is still not quite accurate. Under this definition, psychopaths and others with mental sicknesses that drive them to commit murder, cannibalism, and other crimes against their fellow man could be classified as Grimm. The spirit of this answer is closer to the truth, but still does not hit on the essential definition of Grimm.

The smallest answer category, by far, contains only two percent of the answers. The answers placed in this category hit upon the very definition of Grimm, "That which lacks a soul." Empirical evidence has shown that man has what has been termed a soul, that core of life force and the mind that leaves the body upon death, to be judged by God and condemned to hell or carried to heaven. Study of animal life has shown that they also contain some sort of life force. Evidence of this can be seen in the ability of animals and plants to accept aura or Dust injection, often with strange results. Such results often include a tenfold increase in durability, and the other side effects vary with the processes used. However, Grimm have no such life force, no soul. All attempts to interface with Grimm using aura have failed, often in spectacular ways.

That is what makes a Grimm a Grimm. The lack of a soul, the lack of that life force that drives all other animals and man on Remnant. The cause of this soullessness is unknown, and may never be known, as all attempts to keep a Grimm in captivity to study it have failed. Study in the wild, for obvious reasons, is not an option. Until a better way presents itself, many of the mysteries of the Grimm may never be solved, culminating in the ultimate puzzle of their lack of a soul.

 **AN: This is the prologue to a story idea I've got going. This thing isn't going to be nearly as planned out as Ancient Wonders is, it's going to be more of a, "Oh this'll be fun!" type story, one that I will be writing by the seat of my pants. Hopefully I'll have the first chapter out in a week or so, I want to finish the next chapter of Ancient Wonders first.**

 **Let me know if this prologue intrigues you! See you next time, maybe. Remember: pain is weakness leaving the body, and God bless!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1

"Hya!" Ruby let out a grunt of effort as she swung her scythe, decapitating a Beowulf with ease. As the tip of the blade bit into the soil, she pulled the trigger, sending a 50 caliber round through the gut of another Beowulf behind the first one.

Ruby took a deep breath as she looked around the forest clearing where her team was doing battle. It was one of the simple missions designed to simply keep their skills sharp. All they had to do was clear out a pack of Beowulves that had made their home near the walls of Vale. Each of her teammates was doing as well as she was, tearing through the Grimm by the dozens with no difficulty.

Yang grinned as she punched the Beowulf in front of her, caving its chest in. It stumbled backward, tripping up several Grimm behind it. As they all tried to extricate themselves from the dog pile they found themselves in, Yang leaped up and punched in the center of the group, discharging her gauntlet into the middle of the Beowulves, causing them all to dissolve.

Weiss was dashing around the battlefield, bouncing from glyph to glyph, face a mask of concentration. She finally stopped, staying in one place and casting several Dust-augmented glyphs to burn, entrap, bisect, and various other methods of execution for the Beowulves.

Blake was jumping around, throwing her blade from enemy to enemy, slashing at them with the heavy outer blade of Gambol Shroud. Leaving her doubles behind her to serve as distractions for the Grimm, she was able to easily outrun and outmaneuver all of the Beowulves she fought.

While there were large numbers of Beowulves, the battle went easily, the skill and training of the four girls allowing them to easily dispatch the pack of Grimm. Everything was going fine and dandy, until the Alpha of the pack showed up.

The giant jackal-like Grimm roared, smashing its fists against the ground. The four girls readied their weapons before charging at the monster as a group. "Nightfall!" Ruby cried out, directing Blake and Yang to dash forward and execute one of their combo attacks.

Blake ran ahead, tossing the blade of her kusarigama behind her towards Yang. Yang caught the grip of the sword and stopped, crouching on the ground. Blake kept running, and as soon as she felt the ribbon become taut in her grip, stopped and pulled forward. Yang jumped up, firing down to add extra height. She swung up and over Blake, before swinging down towards the Alpha Beowulf. She released the blade at the right time to fly directly towards it, firing her gauntlets at the Grimm.

Blake, Weiss, and Ruby bolted towards the Grimm as Yang's shots staggered it. They began swiping and stabbing and shooting, and the battle was over in an unexpectedly short time. The four girls stowed their weapons and surveyed the battlefield, filled with broken shrubbery and branches, as well as half-decayed Grimm body parts. "Well that was fun!" Ruby said towards her teammates.

Yang's eyes got wide as she saw one final Beowulf creep out of the trees behind her sister. "Ruby, look out!" she cried out, activating Ember Celica once more. She began running towards Ruby as her sister turned, trying to draw her weapon but getting it caught in a bush. _No no no!_ Yang thought as she started shooting over her sister to attack the Beowulf. However, only clicking greeted her ears – she was out of ammo.

Ruby drew back, reluctant to abandon her baby. She was about to activate her Semblance to pull a last-minute escape, when a black shape threw the Grimm to the side. Her eyes, as well as the eyes of her teammates, followed the shape and saw _two_ Beowulves, one attacking the other!

The two Grimm tussled for a moment, before one achieved a decisive victory and tore the other's throat out with its claws. The victorious Grimm paused for a moment, shaking the blood off his claws before looking at the four girls. "Well don't all thank me at once."

Team RWBY froze. One thought was shared across their minds. _Did that just. . ._ They stared at the Grimm, blinking rapidly out of shock. The Grimm just stared back, blinking as well. "Uh. . . hello?" The Grimm spoke once more, this second time breaking the four Huntresses out of their stasis.

"AAAHHHHH!" Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and Yang screamed in unison as they activated their weapons and began firing at the creepy Grimm. "Please stop shooting please stop shooting please stop shooting!" the Grimm said, running around in circles with its hands over its head, bullets bouncing off it.

 **AN:**

 **So here's the first chapter for Soulless Fiend. This isn't intended to be anything serious or long or anything like that. It's just kinda intended to be for any humorous situations I think of, or that other people request that I can fulfill.**

 **This is why the "prologue" was about the definition of a Grimm. Because here we see a Grimm that is decidedly un-Grimmlike.**

 **Curious? Amused? Disgusted? Have an idea? Leave a review!**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2:

After more than a few minutes of nonstop shooting at the freaky-deaky-creepy talking Grimm, team RWBY's ammo was depleted, and the Grimm was none the worse for wear. When it realized the noise of discharging weapons was gone, he stopped running around and peeked out from between its arms.

"Are you done? Please tell me you're done," it asked them with desperation in its voice. The four girls looked at each other. They wanted to destroy the freaky-deaky-creepy Grimm, but they were reluctant to get close to it, and all they had were their melee weapons.

The Grimm dropped his arms and sagged, making a noise that sounded like it was supposed to be a sigh. " _Thank_ you," it said, adding extra emphasis to the 'thank'. "Do you have any idea how many times I've tried to approach a group of humans, only to be SHOT AT?" It had failed to notice that the four girls were not shooting due to lack of ammo instead of due to a desire to hear it out. "Over and over and over again!" It took a step towards them, prompting them to immediately and in unison take several steps back.

"For years, I've watched from the shadows, waiting for the perfect time to introduce myself!" The Grimm turned to face Ruby, pointing at her as it went off on a tangent. "By the way, I saw the way you dealt with that Nevermore several months ago." It drew a finger across its neck. "Very impressive, big fan." The Grimm began to pace back and forth, making wild gestures that only got wilder as went on, its voice becoming more and more dramatic. "Every time! Every time I start to get near someone, they attack me! What have I done to deserve this? Attacking me because of the way I look? That's racist! But," and here its voice took on a fake calm tone, "like a good little Grimm I waited, patiently. 'Your time will come,' I told myself. And finally," It turned to face the four girls, its voice slowly losing the fake calm. "Finally, an opportunity presents itself. I see the chance to show my true colors from the moment I meet someone! I see the chance to be the hero and save somebody! And what thanks do I get? ATTACKED, ONCE AGAIN!" RWBY leaned back, their fear being slowly replaced by utter befuddlement and bemusement. The Grimm paused. "You know what? I'm done! You wanna kill me, kill me. Go on!" It tapped its chest as it closed its eyes.

Ruby started giggling, Weiss, Blake, and Yang looking at her like she'd lost her mind. "You should be an actor!" Ruby said. "You'd be really good."

The Grimm opened its eyes. "You're. . . not running? Or attacking me?"

"Nope! Whatever you are, you're not like normal Grimm? Why should I kill you?" Ruby asked.

The Grimm paused, a strange look on his face. "I don't really know. I've rehearsed this general event many times in my head, but never imagined getting this far."

Ruby walked up to the Grimm, shrugging off Yang's grip on her arm, Yang hissing in her ear, "What are you doing?" Ruby stopped in front of the Grimm, looking up as it towered over her. She stuck out her hand and said "Hi! My name's Ruby! What's yours?"

The Grimm looked down at her hand before carefully grasping it. "Hm. I've never picked out a name for myself. It should be something awe-inspiring! Something that symbolizes my status as better than my brethren, something fitting a heroic Grimm! Yes, you may call me. . . Steve!"

"Nice to meet you Steve!" Ruby answered cheerfully, excitedly shaking Steve's hand, causing his arm to shake from the force Ruby was exerting. "Now let's get back to Beacon!"

"Ruby, there's no way we're taking this beast back with us to the school," Weiss rained on Ruby's parade. Ruby spun around to respond to Weiss, Steve clasping his chest behind her and falling to his knees, shaking his fists at the sky with a silent scream on his face.

"Sure we are! We'll show him to Ozpin!" Ruby replied. She spun around and pointed towards the distance dramatically. "Off to Beacon!" Yang walked up to her sister and spun her around by the shoulder to face the other way.

"Beacon's that way, sis," Yang said. Ruby's face fell as the rest of her team plus Steve walked past her. Before Steve could pass her, she grasped his wrist. "Piggy back ride!" she declared. Steve sighed a long-suffering sigh, realizing he was probably getting in over his head. Regardless, he grasped the young Huntress and put her on his shoulders, following her teammates as she dramatically pointed onward.

 **AN: Alright, here you go. Take the second plot chapter. I, personally, think it was worth a chuckle or two. As you probably noticed, Steve has a tendency toward melodrama. There will probably be one or two more chapters to settle Steve in to Beacon. After that, this'll basically become a series of one-shots all focused around the idea of Steve the sentient Grimm. If you have an idea for a one-shot, let me know and I'll try to write it!**

 **On a different note, how has this story gotten a much more enthusiastic reaction than Ancient Wonders? That's a story that I am proud of, one that I am putting careful thought into, and Soulless Fiend is a string of silliness. Seriously, in twenty four hours, this gets three reviews, three favorites, and six follows, while it took Ancient Wonders months to get those same numbers. What's up with that?**

 **See you next time! God bless!**


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